mad is on

it’s not that i never thought i would care

i just didnt think i would care this much

i have never stayed up an entire night upset

even looking at certain things around my room right now is making me tear up

when my phone lights up with a text it won’t be from you

i won’t see your picture come up when you call me

(hell i probably won’t even be speaking on the phone at all)

there are so many things that remind me of you

i think that’s what sucks the most, i can’t get away anywhere

you became such a huge part of me that you’ve infiltrated pretty much every part of my life, which i didn’t mind and now i wish more than anything could happen again

and just opening my facebook messages and seeing your deleted profile

and listening to your voicemails literally made me stop breathing

i just want to text you and say good morning how did you sleep i love you have fun at work and i want you to call me on the way home from work and come over and sit on my couch with me and laugh at stupid things on my computer together and show me new episodes of tv shows that i haven’t seen before and kiss me goodbye and call me on the way home and text me at rehearsal and call me to say goodnight

well shit

this is what it feels like huh

i really don’t like it :’(